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 Post subject: I need guidance
PostPosted: Mon Jun 05, 2006 7:41 pm 
Ok, first let me introduce my self. My name is Sontee, I am 18 and recently graduated from highschool, well I offically graduated in Decemeber. Anyway, I started college at a community school and will be attending an out of state school in the fall. I recently found out that I am 5 months pregnant, I know it shocked the hell out of me too, but I wasn't having any symptoms. The thing is, me and the father have had a really rough relationship full of violence and cheating, and in all honesty, I don't want to go through that with him again. I don't even know if I should tell him about the baby. As for my parents they are extremely strict and have always told me to finish school first and get a career before starting a family. Its very unlikely that they will support me since me having this baby goes against everything that they've taught me.

I've been stressing over what to do with school, out of state fees, tution, and raise a baby. I know I can't do this alone and I really don't think that my parents will help. I've talked to my pastor but all he's been saying is do whats in your heart and that he'll pray for me, but somehow that isn't enough. Whats in my heart is to let this baby go. I can't handle all thats going on right now and I know I wouldn't be able to be the best mother to this child. I feel so lost right now. If anyone can give me advice or any kind of testimonial of how they've gotten through a situation somewhat like this, I'd really be grateful.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 05, 2006 8:22 pm 
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Joined: Thu Jun 01, 2006 12:58 pm
Posts: 18
Hiya!

Theres nothing I can say that will make all this go away, but what may make you feel better is knowing that other people are in your position aswell. I know that there are a few girls on this forum that are young and pregnant too. Im 18 and 9 weeks pegnant, Im still happy with the father but theres no guarantee of wedding bells and Im far from getting my career sorted out. I dont intend to let having a baby young ruin my chances of ever getting a career. In fact it probably makes me more determined. You should have a read of the 'feeling sad' poll.. a story shared on that is really comforting, and shows you that its not the end of the world even though you may feel like that right now. Im not even gona start talking about doing the right thing, you will find out what that is with time. If your 5 months pregnant doesnt that mean that abortion is out of the question??? Which either leaves you with the option of adoption of simply keeping it.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jun 05, 2006 8:34 pm 
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Joined: Thu Jun 01, 2006 12:58 pm
Posts: 18
Hiya!

Theres nothing I can say that will make all this go away, but what may make you feel better is knowing that other people are in your position aswell. I know that there are a few girls on this forum that are young and pregnant too. Im 18 and 9 weeks pegnant, Im still happy with the father but theres no guarantee of wedding bells and Im far from getting my career sorted out. I dont intend to let having a baby young ruin my chances of ever getting a career. In fact it probably makes me more determined. You should have a read of the 'feeling sad' poll.. a story shared on that is really comforting, and shows you that its not the end of the world even though you may feel like that right now. Im not even gona start talking about doing the right thing, you will find out what that is with time. If your 5 months pregnant doesnt that mean that abortion is out of the question??? (Dont take my word on this). Which either leaves you with the option of adoption of simply keeping it. Whether you could give your baby up for adoption of not is obviously something only you would know. I dont know where your from? But im from England and here there is alot of financial (benefits, housing, childcare) help available here for teens with babies. You should look into that kind of information in your area to help you make up your mind, also look into abortion dates in case that is an option your considering. Just one last thing.... The likelyhood is, your parents reation (should you chose to tell them) will shock you. Alot of people find there parents to be very supportive after all you are their daughter and this is their grandchild. I got pregnant at 16 (miscarried) and I was amazed how supportive my Mum was. And you and your boyfriend, if you couldnt sort things out, maybe he would still be there for his baby. And if not :-( alot of women manage to raise a child on their own and im sure you wouldnt be alone family and friends will always be there for you. And you will fall in love again.

I hope I helped you a little!
Take Care x


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Jun 11, 2006 2:04 am 
Hi sontee. I totally understand what you're going through. My ex and I broke up not long after I told him I was pregnant, though he wasn't abusive. I know you don't want to, but i think u should tell him about the baby, but then again I don't really know what type of harm he is capable of. And as far adoption/parents, think about it loooooooooooong and hard, my mom tried to make me give my son up, but when she saw his ultrasound and felt him kick, she changed her mind. I'm not sure how ur parents reacted, but no matter what they said or did, they love you. I hope u do what u feel is best, so that you won't have anything to regret later down the road. I sent u a message in case u want to email me, my address in it. I hope everything works out to your advantage.


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