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Posted by kim on April 30, 2003 at 08:56:39:
In Reply to: No Father Involved posted by Katie on January 28, 2003 at 16:17:25:
I know its been months since a last post, but you're still pregnant so this "advice" may hold some water. I'm just turned 21 and I had a child at the age of 20. My daughter is almost a year old and the first thing her father said when he found out I was pregnant was, GET AN ABORTION. I don't believe in such, no matter how bad the situation is and I can tell you I am so happy I didn't kill my daughter. The father did somewhat support me emotionally throughout the pregnancy and was there when she was born and he does help out a bit now. Life is extremely difficult with a baby, you may choose adoption, but it is something for you to really think about. I strongly suggest you talk to the father, telling him you had an abortion was a mistake only because now he can alltogether deny this is his child. May I also make you aware that he has to pay child support and help you legally in various ways whether he wants to or not. You do not have to seek his permission and blessings to have this baby, it is your right, your body and most importantly your decision. My parents have been very supportive and if you have supportive parents please trust that it will all be ok. Your blood is always thicker than water. My advice would be to keep this child and raise it, only because it is a truley rewarding thing being a mother, but if you know deep down in your heart that you can't give this baby unconditional love and attention it may be best to give him/her up. I have felt guilty for not staying with the father of my child, but more than half of this country is divorced and many of them have children. My daughter is not a minority and having a single parent is almost a norm in america today so I try to believe that not having a dad living with her will not be an extreme negative impact on her. Also keep in mind, when your ex-boyfriend sees his child, his opinions may change he may appreciate the beauty of a new life, but YOU MUST DECIDE WHATS BEST FOR THAT BABY and not count on anything.
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